In some circles, discussions about work-life balance have shifted to talking about work-life integration. Whatever you call it, many people are searching for a way to juggle their personal and professional roles. I know I did! Yes, that was past-tense.
I spend a lot of my sessions with clients helping them work towards their idea of work-life integration, so I thought I would share what has made me feel successful in meeting my daily challenges.
Guiding Principles
1. Make your own decisions. Everyone’s definition of success looks different. Focus on what makes you happy and productive. Consider whether you and others may be projecting your beliefs when you comment on someone else’s lifestyle. What may be right for you might not be right for someone else.
2. Consider your boundaries. Some people find it disruptive to take business calls after office hours. Others feel stressed if they’re out of touch for any extended time. If possible, negotiate an arrangement with your employer that is comfortable for both of you.
3. Think long term. There are always trade-offs. Assess whether frequent overtime or spending more hours with your family will make you happier when you look back on what you did with your life. (Either way can be right, look to your values and beliefs to do what feel right to you.)
4. Update your plans. Your answers may change as you go through life. Check-in frequently to stay on track. You may be eager to gain new experiences when you first graduate from school. As you approach retirement, you may want to volunteer more in your community.
5. Give yourself credit. It’s common to feel guilty about working too little or too much. Focus on doing the best you can. I often keep a list of what I have accomplished each day that allows me to be honest with myself about what I completed, which is usually a lot! Personally, without this, I tend to feel like I didn’t get enough done, which leads to me feeling guilty about spending time with family.
6. Remain flexible. Financial constraints and other factors may influence your decisions. Work with whatever circumstances you face while you try to improve them. Remember, you make the best decision you can, based on the information you have at that time.
7. Look for fulfillment. Most people feel unfulfilled because they do not recognize when they have it. It can be easy to get caught up in what we think we don’t have instead of giving credit to the things we do have that already make us happy.
Time Management
1. Be realistic. Establish your top priorities and stick to them. If you’re struggling with your to-do list each day, you probably need to cut back on the less essential tasks.
2. Get organized. You can accomplish more when you have dependable systems in place. Look for ways to run your errands more efficiently and keep your surroundings free of clutter.
3. Limit distractions. Maybe you lose track of time watching TV or talking on the phone. Reclaim those wasted hours.
4. Schedule downtime. Your mind and body need adequate rest. Take a warm bath or meditate daily.
Additional Suggestions
1. Recognize individual differences. Some people are content viewing their job as just a paycheck, and others blend their paid work with the rest of their life. Any combination is okay as long as you find fulfillment.
2. Ask for support. Help from family and friends or paid services can help you to focus on your most vital areas. Ask your children to take on more chores or consider hiring a house cleaner. Use the extra free time to pursue a promotion or start a vegetable garden.
3. Reach out to others. Look for ways you can provide the same kind of assistance to those around you. Team up with a coworker so you can cover each other’s work on sick days or vacations rather than creating a backlog for when you return.
4. Take care of yourself. Keeping yourself fit enables you to contribute at home and the office. Eat a nutritious diet, exercise regularly, manage stress, and stick to a regular sleep schedule.
5. Be yourself at work. As much as possible, reveal your authentic self at work. It will liberate others to do the same. You’ll also be more likely to form genuine friendships with your colleagues, which will make your days more pleasant.
6. Stop “Shoulding” on yourself. Start paying attention to how often you tell yourself that you should or shouldn’t be doing something. Practice being in the moment and allowing yourself just to be. Over time, you will begin to notice that you have more desire to do things because you are actively choosing to do them because you want to, not because you feel guilty about not doing it.
It’s a big job to coordinate all the facets of your life. Think about your definition of success and what it means for how you align your personal and professional responsibilities.
If you need some guidance, I am here to help!
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